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the universe has a way with you.

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Oct. 3rd, 2010 | 10:15 pm
mood: worriedworried
music: the bled-i never met another gemini

i know lately i haven't been the lover i promised you i'd be.hell,i wasn't even stable in the first place.but your rushed urgent phone call today had made me realized that i've took you and your affection for granted which i should never have at all.you coughed out blood and though your still here,that is by far the scariest news i've heard all year besides dad getting in and out of the hospital recently.i have a thing for conflict but i never imagined them to be this heart pounding.and for the first time in my life,with tears conquering the back of my lids and the air choked between my throat,i felt panic.and trust me,i haven't felt that in a long time ever since you-know-who.this is cliche but feeling as though i might lose you had made me understand how you meant to me.you meant so much that i couldn't even begin to imagined that something awful might happen to you.worse,i couldn't even imagine not having you by my side again.

those sticks of nicotine sure are deadly,not so much as the gory visuals the government had plastered all over the cigarette boxes,but really,it kills.i hope that this incident might encourage you to finally put an end to that nasty habit of yours.if not you,i know i will.

i love you.i hope you get better soon,love.

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